My Brain Needs Some Help

My cousin and his girlfriend are throwing a Christmas Orphan party this year.

To make sure that I had the date right in my calendar, I texted my cousin:

That would make a lot of sense.

You know, having a Christmas party on Christmas Day.

That's the whole point of a Christmas Orphan party.

Someone help my brain.

Back Pain + Acupuncture + A Very Chinese Question

I hurt my back last week.

It rendered me useless.

This is my acupuncturist:

He really does look like this. When I showed this 

drawing to my mom, she immediately knew who it was.

Dr. Chen's very good at what he does.

(I went through a lot of acupuncturists before finding him.

Okay, my mom did.)

Unable to deal with the pain on my own, I spent Saturday in his office.

Some of his diagnostic questions were:

"Where does it hurt?"

"How did you hurt yourself this time?"

"What are you limited in doing?"

"Are you married yet?"

My reaction:

Is there a correlation between 

being married and back pain?

In my head anyway.

I didn't want to rile the person who'll be sticking needles into my lower back for the next few weeks.

Guess which feature of mine my parents think is most beautiful?

Back when I was in 7th or 8th grade, my parents and I were sitting in the living room of our house, each doing our own thing, my sister off somewhere upstairs doing whatever it was she was doing, when all of a sudden, my mom starts talking quietly to my dad:

The most beautiful aspect of our daughter -- 

My ears immediately perked up at the mention of me and I started listening intently to my parents' conversation.

Because what teenager doesn't want to hear complimentary things about herself?

I was supposed to be diligently reading the newspaper.

Clearly, this was more important.

-- are her ears.

She does have beautiful ears.

Thanks, Parents, that's just what a teenaged daughter wants to hear, that her most beautiful feature are her ears.

This makes me wonder what your flirting game was like when you were younger, Parents.

RIP, Gym Shirt, RIP

This is my favorite gym shirt.

It's big and soft and gray.

And, has a hole in the middle somewhere.

But, I forgot to draw that in.

It's also very comfortable to move around in.

Which is why it was my favorite dance shirt, back when I was able to dance.

During one of my sweaty sessions last week, I noticed that I was getting lots of weird looks.

I was puzzled by it, but not too worried, and just smiled back and ignored it.

Until I happened to glance down at myself while I was in push-up position.

My boobs were on full display to everyone across the room.

And, my hot pink sports bra wasn't doing anything to help the situation.

Apparently, the neckline of my big, roomie shirt had gotten even bigger and roomier and I hadn't noticed.

And apparently, I was wearing a sports bra that was the wrong size cause the breasteses were falling out of it.

I might as well have been planking in the nude.

Oops.

Basically, what my shirt looked like.

Versus what I THOUGHT my shirt looked like.

I guess my blood, sweat, and tears are working?

Goodbye, Favorite Gym Shirt.

You are being retired.

RIP.

This happens to everyone, right? Tell me your embarrassing gym/workout stories!

Texts vs. Phone Calls vs. Everything Else

Smartphones are everywhere now.

This is where the technology stands in my family.

Mom:

Why can't people just call on the phone 

instead of sending texts?

Me:

Why can't people send me a text instead of calling me?

And then, there's my Dad.

I left a voicemail and texted.
But there's also WeChat and Line.
Oh, and there's another thing I heard about...(etc.)

No.

No comment.

Lunches at Work

This happens to me every time I finish my lunch at work:

But why is all the food gone?

Every single time.

I don't understand why this happens.

Because I pack my own lunches.

You'd think I'd know how much food I eat.

It's My Birthday!!

Today's Friday the 13th.

That means it's my birthday!

These are my bgirls.

Happy Birthday, Janice!!

A photo posted by @kait_e_k on Nov 11, 2015 at 7:26pm PST

I love them so.

Since I couldn't celebrate with them on the day of (because my family is throwing me a party) or on the weekend (because we're celebrating my cousin's birthday on Saturday...there are a lot of birthdays this time of year in my family), we decided to hang a couple of days before.

We went to karaoke.

What I really wanted to do was bungee-jump.

Because I've decided that this year is going to be my year of terrifying pursuits.

But karaoke seemed the more plausible option to propose to my friends for a get-together.

And, to make it more palatable to me, I suggested Disney karaoke.

But, this is what happened instead:

Bgirls can sing, too. @kait_e_k #talented #karaoke #bgirls #NYC

A video posted by yang janice (@yang.janice) on Nov 11, 2015 at 3:59pm PST

@goody_roc making love to me. With her voice. #karaoke #boyziimen #bgirls #NYC

A video posted by yang janice (@yang.janice) on Nov 11, 2015 at 3:52pm PST

I had a blast.

Then we went out for burgers -- 'cause that's our tradition -- afterwards, where we took approximately 6,982 selfies to try and get one acceptable picture. The evidence is above.

Today, so far, for my birthday, my family has given me:

The task to pick up my own birthday cake after work.

Thanks, Family.

My dad also texted me at 2:50 in the morning.

My sister texted me at 1:23 in the morning.

I am not sure what it says about my fam that they text me birthday wishes when they know I'LL BE ASLEEP.

Granted, my sister is in California. She probably forgot to do the math.

Or, did they want me to wake up pleasantly surprised?

This was the text my dad sent me:

("Precious daughter,
during the quiet, early morning of this long night, I whisper to you:
Happy Birthday!")

To which, I replied:

And, this is what my dad wrote back:

Okay?

Okay, Dad?

Okay.

Haha.

I love my family.

And friends.

I'm a lucky girl.

I come by it honestly.

My mom lives in the apartment below mine.

It's a very, VERY short walk up the stairs from my mom's floor to my floor.

I usually shout down the stairs when I want to talk to my mom.

And she does the same.

We're a very quiet family.

Recently, while I was getting ready to take a shower:

My phone rings.

I was right in the middle of brushing my teeth.

So, I missed it.

After spitting out my toothpaste and rinsing, I look at my call log to return the call:

Mom? Did you just call me from inside the house?!

Yeah, I was too lazy to walk up to tell you to call your sister.

Guys, I come by my laziness honestly.

[TBT] My Sneakers

This will be the last post from the Monkey Whimsy archives for Throwback Thursday.

It's been wonderful sharing these old posts with you, I hope you've enjoyed them!

The entry below is one of my absolute favorites.

Because it's about my One True Love.

Shoes.

Sneakers, to be precise.

They're my spirit animal.

If sneakers were animals.

Recently, I had to throw out the pair that inspired this post.

That was heartbreaking.

I wore those babies until they were holey on the bottom.

That seems to be a trend with me.

Good thing I still have the opposite pair left.

I hope they last forever and that we live happily ever after.

A girl can dream, right?

Monday, September 16, 2013
My Sneakers

These are my shoes.

I bought two pairs of Adidas last year and switched the right foot.

Or, was it the left foot?

I was hoping to get a purple and yellow combination going but no such luck.

People often stop me and ask if my sneakers came like that or if I made them that way.

Now you know.

I often get stared at on the subway.

I'm never sure if it's my sneakers or something else.

Which is why I always make sure to have a piece of vegetable lodged between my teeth.

Sometimes, I'll match my socks to my sneakers instead of to each other.

Who says you have to wear matching socks?

Or match anything at all?

Shopping vs Exercising. Or, Hate vs Laziness

My natural state of being.

A few weeks ago, I started a new job where I have to wear conservative suits to work every day.

Since I didn't have any, I came up with the brilliant idea of going shopping with my mom.

Because I hate shopping.

My mama hates it, too. On opposite day.

This meant I could be lazy and just stand in the dressing room while my mama handed me things to try.

It was like having my own personal shopping assistant except it was my mom so we're going to call it mother-daughter bonding time.

After trying on a couple of ill-fitting suits, my mom mentions that she has a couple of suits she doesn't wear anymore and that I could have them.

And I said: Why didn't you tell me this sooner?

She then followed it up with: It might be a tad small on you. But, you could just go to the gym some more!

You might have noticed that Asians have no filter when it comes to family.

I pondered that thought for a moment:

Because as you all know:

I can be quite lazy.

But, the choices were:

Continue shopping.

And trying on clothes for who knows how long.

Or, exercising.

It was a hard decision.

My lazy side really wanted to win the internal debate.

And do neither.

But, alas.

Guess which side won?

Exercise did.

Because that's how much I hate shopping.

This might be one of the few times my extreme laziness did not win.

How about you? Which side would've won for you?

[TBT] Trip to Taiwan & Vietnam

I have such nostalgia for Asia right now.

The desire to travel is STRONG.

Good thing today is Throwback Thursday and we can take another trip down memory lane!

Warning: Today's post from the Monkey Whimsy archives contains explicit pictures so please stop here if you would prefer not seeing any graphic images.

Thursday, August 23, 2012
Trip to Taiwan & Vietnam

I was looking through pictures I took last December of my trip to Asia and realized I never shared some of the more interesting sights I saw while there.

Let me share with you some of these gems.

While in a temple in Vietnam, my sister and I were browsing through the gift shop when I spotted this book:

We, being awesomely mature late-20-year-olds, couldn't stop giggling.

Remember this photo?

My sister was yelling at me.

She said she needed to show me something.

I thought it was going to be something profound.
Something life-changing.
Or both.

This is what my sister had to show me:

Is this something profoundly life-changing?

Or life-changingly profound?

We were at Thanh Chuong Viet Palace near Hanoi.

This statue was located in an area of the grounds that most people would probably never venture to. My sister found it because she has this tendency to keep going and going until she can't anymore. I have this annoying habit of trying every single door in sight until I'm blocked by a locked one. We make great houseguests.

I have to say though, nothing beats what I found in Taiwan.

My aunt and uncle and two cousins took me to Jiǔfèn where there's lots of yummy food and cute little shops.

While browsing through one of the gift shops stocked with children's toys, I picked up this keychain thinking it was a metal puzzle for children:

It was not a puzzle piece.

It was also not a children's toy.

However, these keychains could come in handy for those conversations about the birds and the bees. That must be why it was stocked in a children's toy store. Nothing beats visual aids.

I regret not getting one.

A very different reaction to being sick

This is the third time that I've been sick in three months.

I didn't even try to deny it when I first started coughing.

I was resigned at this point.

Instead, I had a very different reaction to being sick.

Uh oh. Sick again.

But, that means I'll lose weight.

Which means I can eat ALL THE THINGS to make up for it.

And that's how you make a sick person happy.

I also recognize that my reaction to being sick might be a little demented.

Because eating ramen and ice cream and desserts is probably NOT the best way to recovery.

How about you? How do you cope with being sick?

(And sorry to the people who will hate me for saying I lose weight when I get sick. But I do.)